


A Good Godbrother

by Alemantele



Series: Godbrother AU [1]
Category: Kagerou Project, Mekakucity Actors
Genre: Gen, Shintaro is a little bit dense, Sort of AU, godbro!AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-28
Updated: 2014-06-28
Packaged: 2018-02-06 15:17:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,221
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1862595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alemantele/pseuds/Alemantele
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Well, if anything ever happens to me, will you promise me something, Shintaro?”</p><p>“Huh?…Sure, I guess.”</p><p>“Promise you’ll take care of my siblings! For me! Promise you’ll be a good godbrother!”</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Good Godbrother

He looks up, and the sun is not shining in his eyes.

It is raining, supposedly fitting for a funeral, but Shintaro doesn’t like the feel of a clouded-over sky or of the sound of raindrops beating down on his (red) umbrella. At least, not for this funeral. Not for _her_ funeral.

It wasn’t supposed to be raining.

He remembers her smile the best under a hazy midday’s sun, with her scarf billowing in the wind against a cloudless and light streaked sky.

Shintaro bows his head, closes his eyes—

                                —he can’t see her standing in the rain.

It wasn’t supposed to be raining.

She—she wasn’t supposed to die.

He can still see her sometimes, in his dreams, and since his mother told him the news, he’s been trying to dream of her every day. The dreams don’t capture her radiance, her cheer, her _life_ (he never dreams of her as she was, only as a ghost) but every time she smiles he never wants to wake up ever again.

(He sees her, now, standing in a patch of sunlight free from the rain, her bright red scarf carving a path in the sky behind her. She tilts her head and smiles at him.

He can see her dimples, can see the sparkle in her warm brown eyes.

She opens her mouth and he wonders what she is going to say to him and—

“Sorry I died.”)

Shintaro jerks out of his stupor, glancing up at the eulogies still being delivered. Of course. Even his hallucinated Ayano would be so _Ayano._ Shintaro didn’t doubt for a second that she would’ve said that exact same thing if she could talk to him now.

He doesn’t know whether to laugh to cry at this. Ayano would’ve done both—when she is upset, she likes to rant to him vaguely about her troubles and then collapse in a fit of giggles through her tears. “I’m so stupid, aren’t I, Shintaro?” she usually says. “I shouldn’t care so much, but I do.” Shintaro never knows what she is upset about, not specifically. She always laughs it off and tells him not to worry about her. She always knows how to cheer _him_ up, though, even if he never shows it and—

She—she always _knew._ Ayano had _liked_ to rant to him. She had always _laughed—_ Ayano—

                    —Ayano didn’t laugh anymore.

(God he’s so stupid. Why did he never press the issue? Why did he never ask her what was wrong? Why did he never _say_ anything?)

What was Ayano hiding in that smile?

Shintaro stares at the picture of her they have propped up in the display, and he can tell it’s from the last couple of months because her dimples are showing and her smile is just the slightest bit strained. He hadn’t noticed it at the time, but when he was desperately pouring over photos of her one night (every night), he started to see the way her face grew more and more tired and noticed the bags under her eyes and started cursing himself for not seeing it coming.

(He hasn’t stopped since. _Dammit._ )

Their last conversation had been strangely final, and Shintaro hadn’t realized it until weeks after—

After she—

After she was gone.

(“Hey, can we talk?”

“If you want."

“I just… I just have something I want to ask you.”

“What, like a favour?"

“Sort of.”

“What is it?”

“You know, I have three younger siblings.”

“Yeah? And? What’s that gotta do with anything?”

“We adopted them... When they first got here, they were pretty… well they were pretty shaken up.”

“What, were they abused or something?”

“Eh… sort of, I guess. They all had it pretty rough and I’m still trying to be a good big sister to them!”

“Mm…and how’s that working for you?”

“It’s… well I dunno, really.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“…nothing… Nothing much! Just…”

“What? Spit it out already.”

“Well if anything ever happens to me, will you promise me something, Shintaro?”

“Huh? …Sure, I guess.”

“Promise you’ll take care of them! For me! Promise you’ll be a good godbrother!”

“…”

“Shintaro, please.”

“Uhm, alright. If you really want.”

“Promise me!”

“Okay! Okay, I promise. Happy?”

“…”

“Uh… you okay?”

“Yeah! Yeah I’m fine. I’m just really glad. I knew I could count on you, Shintaro. I’m really really happy. Now look here! I’ll tell you all about them—I even have pictures! So this is Tsubomi, and she’s usually calm and really quiet but don’t get her angry! Tsubomi’s fierce when she’s angry! This here is Shuuya and please please please please please don’t get too angry at Shuuya cuz his heart’s in the right place but he can be really annoying sometimes. Please please just give him a chance and don’t yell too much when he plays pranks on you, please. Mm, and here’s Kosuke—he’s the one in the white hoodie and he’s really kind but he gets into these slumps sometimes and you have to try and help him and…”)

They had talked for hours. Tsubomi and Shuuya fought a lot (but Ayano always thought their make-ups were the cutest things!) and Kosuke liked the story about the medusa in the forest the most. Tsubomi doesn’t like fires and Kosuke doesn’t like to go swimming and Shuuya always makes bad jokes when he gets anxious at strangers and Ayano had never told him _why_ he needed to know all this.

 _‘If anything ever happens to me,’_ she had said and Shintaro still hadn’t caught on. 

Shintaro buries his head in his hands, barely paying attention to the rest of the eulogies. The rain falls, slow and constant, and he wishes he could escape to his heat hazy memories, back to when things made sense and Ayano was still there with him. The photos she gave him are still in his pocket. 

Her smile is still in his mind, but the image is fuzzy around the edges and he knows that soon, he won’t remember it anymore. 

Shintaro sighs, cursing himself to hell and back for not noticing for not helping for not talking to her more kindly for sitting there passively all the damn time for being such an awful friend for—

( _why_ )

The rest of the funeral passes in a daze.

Shintaro tries not to make a sound. Perhaps he could just disappear. He sits, entangled in memories he can’t let go of.

The rest of their classmates disgust him, all of them dabbing at their eyes with tissues as they chatter amongst themselves. They all act so sad, so sincere, so teary, but it’s all just that in the end—an _act_.

When it is time to leave, Shintaro stays back, stands over her picture, and tried to reconcile this tired eyed strained smiled Ayano with the bright image in his mind

It doesn’t work.

He didn’t expect it to.

Shintaro tries anyways.

Nearby, there are three children, huddled together. Shintaro vaguely wonders where their parents are before he catches a flash of green and looks over at them fully.

His eyes widen.

His fingers touch the edges of the photos he has kept for so long.

If Shintaro couldn’t save her, he can at least do this. He can keep his promise 

“Tsubomi! Shuuya! Kosuke!”

**Author's Note:**

> So me and friends were rather displeased by the Mekakucity Actors anime, to say the least. 
> 
> Thus this is the first of perhaps more fics in a reimagining of Kagerou Project! :)


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